.
Between you, me and the three people who have noticed…. I haven’t been to a support group, written a newspaper column, posted on Parkinality facebook or written a blog for differing lengths of time
Even I, self proclaimed positivity person, has been stretched, resulting in a finger stinging twang.
Despite my best attempts at a jaunty smile and heel click, I can’t dress it up – I need that brain operation.
I am still fortunate that I do get flashes of normality, very occasionally those flashes can last a couple of hours. But generally walking, talking and dancing are disappearing and those invisible symptoms are dragging me down …
So I am trying to pull myself together and have started writing poetry again … entering competitions and doing some art.
I’m trying not to wallow and at this moment in time I am sitting on the exercise bike typing with one finger whilst listening to Popmaster not feeling too bad ish
Wallowing Ode
I stink I smell
I’m not doing very well
Not washing every hour
Not washing every day
I should simply
Shut up and go away
I should brush my teeth
I should comb my hair
But do you know what
I really don’t care
I don’t care what I look like
I don’t care how I feel
Just look me in the eyes
What you see is real
I’m not sweetness and light
I’m not full of positivity and cheer
I’m a sad person full of fear
I am fearful of each day
When I awake from my sleep
The thoughts in my head
Would make a grown man weep
They slither round my brain
Like a continuous snake
And do you know what
They are real not fake
My future is desperate
My future is bleak
(Yes I am aware)
My eyes have started to leak
I should turn the music up
Dance around the house
Attempt a volley and an ace
Am I a man or a mouse?
Actually I am neither
I am scared and more
(At time of writing)
Crying isn’t against the law
A funny one to lighten the mood …
Nope
